I am an epileptic
I am an epileptic.
They keep me in a box.
Sometimes a seizure
twists my arms behind me –
I scream & scream.
I think I’m nothing
but a bundle of broken bones,
not even a memory.
At night, my arms,
twisted out of their sockets
dangle on hot threads of pain.
Sometimes they nail my flesh
on a broken doorway
& then I can hear
some kind of heavy animals
moving around
in the shed behind me.
After a while, the sweet smell
of straw & cow shit
starts to grow like an oily grass
in the crevices of my brain.
Sometimes they put a train whistle
into my spine & a horrible
liquid comes out & burns my legs.
Once they tied
a lock of ancient hair
to a thin gold chain
around my wrist –
the hairs on my wrist
were vibrating
like they were trying to talk.
One time I heard the sound
of crashing garbage cans in the alley
at the end of the street.
One of my arms was torn off
& I saw it huddled up
like a dying animal
in the muck by the wall,
then a large raccoon
came out of one of the cans.
It sniffed at the arm,
daintily picked up one finger,
but the finger came off
in its beautiful silver & black hand.
I looked closely
& saw that the finger
was torn & bleeding at the knuckle.
I screamed & after awhile
it stopped. 

I went down there by the ocean
I went down there by the ocean
where I used to walk,
saw an old man
searchin’ through the bones
of wasted TV’s  & old telephones.
The wires were ripped out of the sky 
so they dangled down
& almost touched the trees.
Everything was different shades of grey –
waves washed up on the dirty sand
& the wrecked flag
flap flapped in a desultory wind.
There were three predatory children
hiding in a drift-wood fire,
their faces bent by the heat of it.
They had yellow eyes & yellow teeth
& there was an eagle up there in the ripped sky
lookin’ for meat.
After a while I dragged myself out of there
Sunday the 13th.
 
I’m just a Dream operator
stuck in a broke-down elevator.

Dream operator
I had a dream & in my dream
the wind was washin’ the sky’s bright face
& the angels were all lined
up for the angel race.
A bunch of kids were runnin’ round
in tatters & rags
& then I saw the soldiers
all sewed up in their body bags.

I’m just a dream operator
in a broke-down elevator.
I need a witness,
someone can go the distance.
I need a witness,
take care of all this dirty business.

I had a dream & in my dream
there was an owl
sittin’ on a washed out bridge,
a broke down barn
& a fridge with no door,
empty trailer park,
barb wire garden –
broken, all broken down.
Everything in ruin –
nobody knows what the hell they’re doin’,
ain’t got a clue.

I’m just a dream operator
stuck in a broke-down elevator.
I want a witness, I need a witness,
someone to witness me.

I had a dream & in my dream
there were skid marks at the junction,
a rusted out wreck half buried in the river,
an old crow all tired out from talkin’,
& down the end of a dead-end street,
there was a tree that died hard of lightnin’,
I kissed a woman who couldn’t sleep
& then the man came round
from the blood police.

I’m just a dream operator
stuck in a broke-down elevator.
I need a witness, I want a witness,
someone to witness me.

I had a dream & in my dream
everybody was a doctor
but nobody had the cure,
a rancid winter sun
was scratchin’ at my back,
blue transit pictures
were slidin down a poison track.
There was a poison wind
& a poisoned blood-stream,
my mind was all poisoned
& so was my dream.

I’m just a dream operator
stuck in a broke-down elevator
I want a witness, I need a witness,
someone to witness me.

I had a dream & in my dream
I saw a snake in deep water,
a snake was in my bed too.
I saw the rain turn red
& a horse gone wild,
I saw an old man waitin’ for sorrow
like he was waitin’ for a ship.
I saw an old woman waitin’ for the second comin’ –
guess everybody gotta wait for somethin’.

The little wind told me a story
& now I’m tellin’ that story to you:
I need a witness, I need a witness
someone can go the distance,
take care of all that dirty business.
I need a witness, I need a witness.